Roxy Farman

MOST OF THE TIME I WOULD FORGET GENESIS BREYER P-ORRIDGE WAS AN ARTIST, MUSICIAN, CULTURAL ENGINEER, WRECKER OF CIVILIZATION, OCCULTIST, FORMER CULT LEADER, POET, WRITER, PANDROGYNE, AND ALL AROUND STRANGE INTELLECTUAL BEING. FOR MYSELF S/HE WAS FAMILY. I’VE NEVER HAD A FRIENDSHIP LIKE THIS ONE BEFORE OR EXPERIENCED SUCH KINDNESS AND UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. S/HE GAVE ME KEYS TO HE/R APT AND LET ME COME OVER WHEN EVER I WANTED. LET ME CRASH ON HE/R FUTON AND KEPT A DARK CHOCOLATE CADBURY BAR IN HE/R CUPBOARD FOR ME. 
WE ALWAYS TRIED TO HAVE FUN. WE MADE UP STUPID SONGS AND GAMES ABOUT EVERYTHING AND WOULD BINGE WATCH ACTION FILMS REPLAYING THINGS IN SLOW MOTION LIKE EXPLODING HEADS AND FIGHT SCENES. 
WHEN I WAS GOING TO OFF MYSELF I WENT TO SEE HE/R WITHOUT MENTIONING ANYTHING ABOUT IT. 
BUT S/HE KNEW ANYWAYS WITHOUT EVER BRINGING IT UP. FOR NO REASON S/HE DECIDED TO TALK ABOUT HE/R OWN ATTEMPTS AND HOW MONTE CAZAZZA TOLD HE/R TO STAY ALIVE OUT OF SPITE. S/HE KEPT INSISTING I CRASH AT HE/RS THAT NIGHT. I WOULD NOT BE HERE TODAY IF IT WERE NOT FOR GENESIS BREYER P-ORRIDGE. 

WE WERE IN THE ELEVATOR ON THE WAY TO THE ONCOLOGY WARD. 
A NURSE WE KNEW, HE/R REGULAR VAMPIRE WHO DRAWS GENESIS BLOOD WEEKLY, SAYS YOU LOOK GREAT!  
GENESIS BREYER P-ORRIDGE REPLIES: CANCER IS THE BEST DIET. 
THE NURSE STARES AT HE/R IN SILENCE AND GETS OFF ON THE SECOND FLOOR. 
WE BOTH LAUGH AS THE ELEVATOR DOOR CLOSES AND THEN CRUISE AROUND THE THIRD FLOOR IN A WHEELCHAIR GOING FASTER THEN WE SHOULD SINGING A SILLY SONG ABOUT HE/R DOCTOR LEE. 
IN THE WAITING ROOM THE CLIPBOARD LADY COMES AROUND CALLING OUT NAMES OF PATIENTS. 
CLIP BOARD LADY ANNOUNCES GINNIE SIS PODRIGDE 
RF:  I THINK THAT’S YOU 
GBP: WHA? SHE IS ADDING AND INVENTING LETTERS
FOR THE REST OF THE DAY I KEPT CALLING HE/R GINNE PODRIGDE.
GENESIS DIDN’T LIKE THAT AND MADE A GROSSED OUT FACE EVERY TIME I SAID IT.

GENESIS BREYER P-ORRIDGE IS ALWAYS MISCHIEVOUS AND WITTY WITH ENDLESS AMOUNTS OF FACTUAL AND EXPERIENCED KNOWLEDGE. S/HE DOESN'T SLEEP MUCH S/HE IS AN INSOMNIAC AND SPENDS MOST NIGHTS READING, WRITING, OR WATCHING FILMS, DOCUMENTARIES, AND T.V. SHOWS. 

IT WAS ALWAYS HARD TO FIND SOMETHING TO WATCH WITH HE/R BECAUSE EVERYTHING I SUGGESTED S/HE HAD ALREADY SEEN TWICE.

SOMETIMES I WOULD TEST HE/R BECAUSE I DIDN'T BELIEVE HE/R AND THEN S/HE WOULD RECITE THE PLOT, THE CHARACTERS, AND THE ENDINGS OF FILMS OR SHOWS I SAID S/HE COULDN’T HAVE WATCHED. S/HE WATCHED EVERYTHING FROM DOCUMENTARIES TO SHITTY BOLLYWOOD FILMS ON NETFLIX AND FOREIGN FILMS AND ALL TYPES OF T.V. SHOWS.   
S/HE WOULD DEVOUR BOOKS LIKE SNACKS WHETHER IT WAS A TRASHY NOVEL, ACADEMIC READ, OR AN OUT-OF-PRINT RARE OCCULT TEXT. S/HE WAS A SPEED READER ALWAYS COLLECTING INFORMATION. 
ONE EVENING WE WATCHED AN EPISODE OF A KOREAN HISTORICAL DRAMA AND GENESIS LEFT A COMMENT ON THE AUDIENCE REVIEWS 

GENESIS BREYER P-ORRIDGE SAYS : WE ARE ADDICTED TO THEE DEEPLY CHEESY BALLADS THAT RUIN ANY INKLING OF EMOTIONAL CONVICTION. MORE!!!!

GENESIS WAS USUALLY SITTING IN AN OFFICE CHAIR IN FRONT OF HE/R DESK WITH HE/R FEET SORT OF DANGLING. S/HE KEPT THE HEIGHT OF HE/R CHAIR HIGH ENOUGH SO THAT THE TIPS OF HER SNEAKERS  COULD TOUCH THE FLOOR ALLOWING HE/R TO SWIVEL FROM SIDE TO SIDE.
S/HE WAS USUALLY STILL FACING HE/R LAPTOP AS I WALKED IN S/HE WOULD SPIN AROUND IN THE CHAIR TO GREET ME.

THAT DAY S/HE MENTIONED S/HE OFTEN LOOKED OUT OF THE WINDOW WATCHING CYCLISTS GOING OVER THE WILLIAMSBURG BRIDGE TRYING TO GUESS WHICH ONE I WAS WHEN I WAS TO COME BY.
I TOLD HE/R I OFTEN TRIED TO GUESS WHICH WINDOW WAS HE/RS WHEN I WOULD GO OVER THE BRIDGE.  
THE NEXT DAY I CYCLED OVER THE BRIDGE  STOPPING IN FRONT OF HE/R BUILDING. 
I CALLED HE/R AND TOLD HE/R TO LOOK OUT OF THE WINDOW AND WAVE SO THAT I WOULD KNOW WHICH WINDOW WAS HE/RS AND TO TAKE A PHOTO OF ME SO THAT I COULD SEE HE/R PERSPECTIVE.
I DID THE SAME TAKING A PHOTO OF HE/R IN THE WINDOW WAVING 
WE WERE FURTHER AWAY THAN WE THOUGHT AND I HAD TO ZOOM IN AS MUCH AS MY SHITTY PHONE COULD. 
THE PHOTO I TOOK WAS A TERRIBLY BLURRY CLOSE UP OF MANY WINDOWS WITHOUT ANYONE VISIBLY WAVING. 
WHEN I GOT UPSTAIRS WE BOTH LAUGHED ABOUT HOW CRAP OUR PHOTOS TURNED OUT. 
GENESIS’S PHOTO WAS AS BAD AS MINE AND S/HE SAID “FUCKIN HELL YOU’RE A LONG BLURRY THING”
“WELL WE TRIED” 

IT’S BEEN THREE WEEKS SINCE YOU DROPPED YOUR BODY AND I’VE BEEN CYCLING AROUND
ENDING UP ON THE WILLIAMSBURG BRIDGE STOPPING WHERE YOUR WINDOW IS THEN TURNING BACK AROUND. 

I WILL NOT SAY GOODBYE TO YOU
S/HE IS STILL HER/E